Monologue 2.

Will I Or Will I Not.

I want to do it! Should I. I'm too frightened. Then again, If I don't, I'll never do it again.

Blimey, I wasn't this bad in my primary school days, years ago, I'm shaking like a leaf and my teeth won't stop chattering. I'll have one more try? At last! I've managed it. I'm standing in five feet of water in my local swimming baths.

It's thirty years since I last attempted it and here I am venturing towards learning to swim. I can't tell my children, I'm scared they'd laugh at me. I'm going to master it, if it's the last thing I ever do. I wish it had been a woman instructor though, this guy keeps holding me by my waist and I feel really uncomfortable about it. I'm sure I'm going to drown. Maybe this is a bad idea. My eyes feel sore, my bum feels numb, and I don't know my left leg from my arm?

Thank goodness this lesson is now over. I'm sweating now at the thought of another lesson next week. I can't stop shivering and it doesn't help with limited space in this cubicle. Now I've got my foot stuck in the turn-up of my trousers. Nothing is going right for me today. At last I'm dressed.

I've got my car keys and I'm starving hungry. That swimming lesson has really knocked the stuffing out of me. Now I'll have to tell the wife a few fibs of my whereabouts. She hasn't a clue that I can't swim? And me going to Barbados in six months.